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» AMERICA’S COLOR REVOLUTION — Brought To You By The U.S. Intelligence Community & Coming To A City Near You
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 17, 2024 5:58 am by kenlej

» Go Russia
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 17, 2024 5:49 am by kenlej

» I am too pretty for math, but....
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeWed Jun 12, 2024 6:56 pm by Mission1st

» Interesting article
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeWed Jun 12, 2024 6:34 pm by Mission1st

» Phony Tony: New Platform, same old song and dance
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeWed Jun 12, 2024 6:32 pm by Mission1st

» The Craziness of Scam by "Tony TNT Renfrow" and the Iraqi Dinar Currency Scam
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeTue Jun 11, 2024 12:26 pm by Mission1st

» Even conspiratorial currency speculators aren’t buying a Russian ruble revalue - It’s not the next the Iraqi dinar
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 10, 2024 1:04 pm by RamblerNash

» The Fundamentals of Finance and Pimpy Live
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeFri Jun 07, 2024 5:02 pm by Dorotnas

» Carnival Rides
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeFri May 10, 2024 5:03 pm by kenlej

» Go Russia
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeSun May 05, 2024 10:51 am by kenlej

» Textbook Tony
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeMon Apr 29, 2024 4:13 pm by Mission1st

» The Rockefellers and the controllers are freaking out right about now
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeFri Apr 26, 2024 11:16 am by kenlej

» Phony Tony sez: Full Steam Ahead!
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeSat Apr 13, 2024 11:51 am by Mission1st

» Dave Schmidt - Zim Notes for Purchase (NOT PHYSICAL NOTES)
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeSat Apr 13, 2024 11:45 am by Mission1st

» Russia aren't taking any prisoners
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeFri Apr 05, 2024 6:48 pm by kenlej

» Deadly stampede could affect Iraq’s World Cup hopes 1/19/23
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 27, 2024 6:02 am by Ditartyn

» ZIGPLACE
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 20, 2024 6:29 am by Zig

» CBD Vape Cartridges
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeThu Mar 07, 2024 2:10 pm by Arendac

» Classic Tony is back
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeTue Mar 05, 2024 2:53 pm by Mission1st

» THE MUSINGS OF A MADMAN
Just for laughs. I_icon_minitimeMon Mar 04, 2024 11:40 am by Arendac

Just for laughs.

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Post by dinarstar Fri Dec 02, 2011 7:29 pm

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain.... good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?

Q : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!



Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

And remember:
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

AND.....

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans...

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.


dinarstar
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Post by Guest Fri Dec 02, 2011 7:45 pm

LOL:lol!:

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Post by Catherine Fri Dec 02, 2011 7:46 pm

lol! lol!
lmao lmao lmao lmao

*****************
COME ON...
RV ALREADY!

Just for laughs. Smiley-happy093Just for laughs. 7_11_117Just for laughs. Smiley-happy093
Catherine
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Post by Alchemist Fri Dec 02, 2011 8:40 pm

"CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you."

Danke shoen! Das ist gut mit gedanke!

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Post by dinarstar Fri Dec 02, 2011 8:49 pm

Пожалуйста,Водка - лечение для всей болезни!

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Post by Alchemist Fri Dec 02, 2011 8:56 pm

Ich moecta eina schnapps bitte!

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